Is it the confetti inside that's drying your thumb out? I'm sending you some bag balm right this minute. It works wonders on cow udders and chapped thumbs.
It gets much worse. The first time you stick that shriveled, wasted thing you call your arm in some warm, soapy water after they remove said cast...WATCH OUT! You'll have all manner of dander and debris to scrub off. Think of it as a science project. You like experiments, right?
BAHAHAHAHA! Lizard Queen! Can't you just put some Neosporin on it every day? That's what I do for my "hangnail" area...the skin splits open near my fingernails there and it just about bleeds sometimes....is awful. SO I wrap it up in some Neosporin overnight. Just a suggestion.
Fuck you for posting this. Now I will have nightmares for eons.
And knowing my luck, my cursing you so rudely will result in my own broken wrist, because karma is a bitch and I'm pretty sure I'm its main target. But still.
You know what though? I still love you. And I think that fact alone should really make you think about how great you are, because your thumb is fucking hideous and I still think you're the greatest. (Hopefully saying that also helps my karma, if you could put a word in for me that would be great.)
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ha ha ha.
ReplyDeleteYour humor cracks me up!
I've seen people whose hands look way worse in the winter when they don't use lotion.
ew. LOTION!!!
ReplyDeleteYIKES! Lotion! PLEASE GIRL!
ReplyDeleteThat's hot. I like how it looks like the desert hardpan in a spaghetti western. Pew! Pew! Pew!
ReplyDeletemmm, yeah thanks... I think I will skip breakfast this morning.
ReplyDeleteThat is not looking pretty but is it felling better?
ReplyDeleteWow. That's... well, wow. That's really something :)
ReplyDeleteIs it the confetti inside that's drying your thumb out? I'm sending you some bag
ReplyDeletebalm right this minute. It works wonders on cow udders and chapped thumbs.
Get yourself some udder cream fast!
ReplyDeleteNah, just lick that shit, that'll fix it right up. Spit is nature's fix-all.
ReplyDeleteIt gets much worse. The first time you stick that shriveled, wasted thing you call your arm in some warm, soapy water after they remove said cast...WATCH OUT! You'll have all manner of dander and debris to scrub off. Think of it as a science project. You like experiments, right?
ReplyDeleteMaybe its just me?...But it looks like a lizard with a blank expression wearing a shirt and pullover! Can I have one!!!
ReplyDeleteOn the positive side, your cuticles are fabulous!
ReplyDeleteSeriously need some exfoliation, you do.
ReplyDeleteBAHAHAHAHA! Lizard Queen! Can't you just put some Neosporin on it every day? That's what I do for my "hangnail" area...the skin splits open near my fingernails there and it just about bleeds sometimes....is awful. SO I wrap it up in some Neosporin overnight. Just a suggestion.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh. OH. MY. GAWSH.
ReplyDeleteFuck you for posting this. Now I will have nightmares for eons.
And knowing my luck, my cursing you so rudely will result in my own broken wrist, because karma is a bitch and I'm pretty sure I'm its main target. But still.
You know what though? I still love you. And I think that fact alone should really make you think about how great you are, because your thumb is fucking hideous and I still think you're the greatest. (Hopefully saying that also helps my karma, if you could put a word in for me that would be great.)
Do you ever just lie in the water near the shore with your mouth open and let little birds hop in and out of it?
ReplyDeleteI wasn't put off by the picture since we have alligators and lizards roaming around here in FL. Get some lotion, dude.
ReplyDelete