Monday, September 27, 2010

Funnest. Game. Ever.

My friends and I can't stop playing this game, although it's resulted in 3 migraines, 2 contact-to-eye glass switches and 14 what the fuck?!s.

It is SO MUCH FUN but also it's obnoxious. And once you start, you can't stop. I'm warning you. Take a gander:



I decided that since we spent so many brain cells coming up with this list of mash-ups, I just had to share with you losers. Because this totally counts as "writing something". Right?

And because I know how slow ya'll are, here's another example from Cougar Town:
  • Clue: A bunch of kids search for treasure on a deserted island and have sex for the first time
  • Mash-Up: Blue Lagoonies

Get the picture? Okay, here you go:
  1. A small mouse is adopted by a human family and has to battle the octopus that wants to steal his voice: 
  2. Jennifer Connelly catches her husband smoking AND cheating when he has their obnoxious house guest write his wedding thank you cards:
  3. Totally righteous buddies travel in a phone booth to a cut-rate amusement park where Kristen Steward works:
  4. A stock broker begins a romance with a much younger man in Jamaica and sings Johnny Be Good at her parent’s high school dance:
  5. A pathetic young girl is torn between a wolf and a vampire while living in Brooklyn with her widowed mother who is torn between her fiancé and his brother:
  6. A shoe manufacturer begrudgingly remodels his home to prepare for his daughter's wedding to a reanimated corpse:
  7. Kevin Spacey gets a job at a fast food joint where all the fixtures have been brought to life by an enchanted rose:
  8. Four New York Women discuss their lives with an celestial being who falls in love with a human:
  9. A woman takes a day trip to Italy with Pauly Shore:
  10. A genetic abnormality allows Woody Harrelson to hustle basketball games all over the world:
  11. Underage kids go to the mall to ask St. Nick for alcohol so they can impress girls:
  12. Soviet invaders are promptly gobbled up by zombies:
  13. Sylvester Stallone arm-wrestles his air force buddy Tom Cruise:
  14. A former neo-Nazi skinhead uses his mutant powers to save his younger brother:
  15. A not-so-well-behaved dog befriends Jim Carrey and his alter egos:
  16. An orphan finds out his entire life has been scripted for television and then leaves to become a stripper:
  17. A group of African animals become professional bowlers:
  18. A race car driver tries his hand at jousting:
  19. Intergalactic clowns take the lives of innocent people in a Mel Brooks parody of Star Wars: A morbidly obese woman dies and is burned in her home as her children are forced off their land during the Great Depression:
  20. Santa is released from the asylum in Louisiana where Vivian Leigh needs to go:
  21. Civil War damsel vows never to go hungry again, even if it means eating Mr. Mole and Mr. Toad:
  22. Rachel McAdams is held hostage on an overnight flight to the same masked sex party that ended Tom & Nicole’s marriage:
  23. A Grandfather reads a fairytale to his grandson about two friends planning a wedding on the same day:
  24. A large, culturally-rich family celebrates their daughter’s nuptials with big hair and 80s tunes:
  25. A Russian Submarine Captain’s son is inspired by the first Sputnik launch to take up rocketry:
  26. A group of card-counting, spotted K-9s must work together to steal millions of dollars and avoid becoming fur coats:
  27. Tommy Lee Jones is busy trying to stop Javier Bardem’s killing spree near the Rio Grande and so is unable to help defend the galaxy from the alien bug race:
  28. A child psychologist doesn’t know he’s dead like Mr. Dashwood:
  29. Alien prawns turn the tables on their egotistical, sexist boss:
  30. *BONUS Three fer* A gang of teenage vampires stalk the LA ghettos where the Goody Bandit runs wild:
Now that you've bent your, have an Excedrin. And a shot of Absolut. And if you come up with some of your own, post them in the comments because I NEED MORE MASH-UPS.