My friend Randi (you'll remember her as the wedding flutist)((or as my doppelganger, although the more I get to know her, the more I realize she's WAY more stable than I am)) wrote this really awesome and deceptively intriguing article about me in the university newspaper. You should go read it and then come straight back here so that any illusion of writer-ly-ness I may have pulled over your eyeballs can be removed when I inevitably say the word "shart".
Speaking of which, I totally sharted all over myself last week, and I'm talking throw-your-underwears-in-the-garbage, walk-around-all-day-going-commando, belatedly-realize-your-cooter-hair-is-protruding-directly-through-the-front-of-your-pants. AT WORK. Kind of shart. It was awesome.
I also realized that I had a very similar incident almost exactly one year ago, which leads me to believe that I eat too much Mexican food in August, and also that September is extra scary.
That's right, I forgot. It totally IS scarier. Thanks Gray.
PS - Welcome, Metro State Metropolitan newspaper readers! I'm so glad you're here for me to horrify!
PPS - Try AJAX. It seems to be the most effective at removing this blog from your mind. And poop from underwear, now that I think about it.
What a nice piece your friend wrote. No wonder you included her in the wedding. Isn't it nice to know that someone has your back at a time like that?
ReplyDeleteDon't you know that you have to build up to Mexican? There is a certain threshold that needs to be attained before over-indulgence.
Did you drag your ass across the carpet to clean it off?
ReplyDeleteI sharted yesterday. It was beautiful.
ReplyDeleteMy new blog entry is not about that. It is about goldfish.
Here it is:
iamyourblog.blogspot.com
Ha, this happened to someone in my yoga class a while back- i was the only one who noticed and couldn't stop laughing!!
ReplyDeleteYou are brave to admit this... LOL!!!
:-)