Thursday, November 20, 2008

Big Motherfucking Fish

DISCLAIMER: If you are offended by footage of dying fish, please do not watch this video. We're talking a HUMAN sized fish will be slaughtered for our own amusement and eating pleasure. Not that I ate it personally. I made grand statements of my intention to eat it (on the video), but it turns out that there were more mouths than there was fish, believe it or not. I DID keep the squid beaks from it's belly, until my divorce.

Ok. If you're still reading, here's the deal: I watched this video again last night (for the first time in more than 2 years), and I decided you all might enjoy watching it after the photos I posted yesterday, at least the first few minutes of it. This video is more than 10 minutes long, and it was shot by a girl who had no intention of doing anything but taking casual photos of dudes holding up trout-sized fish. This big boy, it was not expected to arrive on our boat. Please do not anticipate expert filmography. Also, note the shot crotch I inexplicably took around minute three and a half. Nice.

This was one of the most thrilling experiences of my life. It was a beautiful, sunny day, the air force guy on our charter was chumming over the side of the boat for HOURS (which, any time I am tougher than a military man, I TAKE FUCKING PRIDE YO), and we were over two hours boat ride from the harbor. It's not like we were 35 second from the dock. We had driven forever to get to this one spot our captain swore was good. Turns out, it was good. Now, whether this was due to the bags of bait or due to the continuous stream of vomit in the water, we'll never know.

We were content with each "little" halibut we pulled in, the mere 20-40 pounders, and the various species of rock fish. As you can imagine, when this big guy came overboard, we were a bit flabbergasted. Air Force guy was with his two buddies, Army guy and Navy guy. True story. It was their one last hoorah before they ALL shipped overseas to Iraq. I wonder how they are today, wish I had gotten their contact info. Anyhow, as a tribute to Mr. Chummy Mc'Airforce and his buddies, I present a video longer than you should probably watch. It's only interesting for about 3 minutes, so feel free to click away after that. I couldn't figure out how to edit it down. SORRY!

OH. And please ignore-slash-forgive me for the HORRIBLY ANNOYING semi-southern accent on the video, as well as the shaky camera work. I was freaking out, mind you, two hours from our port in the middle of the ocean on a little boat with a giant fish and a bunch of men who were clearly clueless. (If you make it almost to the end of the video, around minute eight and a half, please note the comment about how this fish was a "good omen for a wedding", and my "oh yeah, I forgot about that for a while" comment. Again, might have been another sign. A fish was enough to distract me from my impending nuptials.)


(if the embeded video doesn't work, click here)