Last night I felt fine. Last night I didn't even feel particularly tired. But I should have known something was wrong when I woke up this morning and felt like I'd been smashed in the face with a 2x4. Especially considering I hadn't had anything to drink last night. Especially considering I didn't take my requisite Tylenol PM before hitting the sack. I should have known something was going down in China town. But it took me nearly vomiting from my first (last) cigarette of the morning before I realized I was getting sick. Now, just a few hours later, I have acquired the following symptoms:
- headache
- achy ears
- coughing
- sore throat
- dizziness (I almost fell over in the hallway about an hour ago)
- fatigue
- generally body aches
- chills
So. I think it's safe to say that I've contracted some form of the Bird Flu, and will be dead by morning. I was nice knowing you all, please feel free to make fun of me in the comment section after I've passed. In lieu of flowers, we request that a donation be made in my name to Schell's Brewing Company, New Ulm, MN.
(Oh, and I'll see some of you in hell. You know who you are.)
Poor baby! Just get plenty of rest and fluids, and next year, get a flu shot. They really do help. And I always hated when there was no snow on the ground for Christmas. What the fuck's the point of living in a cold place if you can't even have a white Christmas??
ReplyDeleteI could bring you some soup but i am being drowned in bullshit.
ReplyDeleteOh no good.
ReplyDeleteChew on juice pops and stay away from poopcicles.
You'll see us in hell?
ReplyDeleteWell...they've already assured me that you'll have ALL ACCESS backstage passes.
Look for me anyway.
I'll be the one submerged in ice up to my neck.
Check the 9th circle.
P.S. Zycam!
GWS
Zycam! Shove those swabs up your nose and swirl!
ReplyDeleteIt's cold here too, although not quite that cold. I think we are about 7 above. Wait, no it has doubled in warmth. We are now up to 14 degrees. Heat wave!
Yesterday almost all day (which would translate to about four hours) it was sunny. Which meant it was cold. Cold like my MIL's heart. Since we have a foot and a half of snow, I am happy with the cold cold and the sunshine, and last night, the bastard on ABC 13 news toyed with my affection when he claimed we would have peeks of sunshine for the next five days. But the bastard lied, because we have that heavy gray overcast sky, that looks like more snow. Bastard.
It could be worse, your cold. I had one once in the summertime in Tucson. Having a cold when it is 107 degrees out is just wrong. It's sucks beyond belief.
Aw. Feel better!
ReplyDeleteThe donation to "Schell's Brewing Company" made me giggle!
ReplyDeleteMy dearest Cat, I barely knew ye. Struck down in your prime by the avian plague. I'm off to the six pack store to pay my respects. I think a six pack of Snow Storm would be appropriate.
ReplyDeleteOh no, bird flu! It was nice knowing you, even if it was just for a short while.... see you in hell!
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I hope you feel better soon, being sick sucks major ass....
Oh shutup and stop whining. You've got 7 days.
ReplyDeleteSick Sucks!
ReplyDeleteJust don't use one of those Neti pots because they seriously creep me out. I'm sorry you're sick. Every single member of my household has been sick in the last month including me and it's insane!!!!! Feel better soon. P.S. chicken soup doesn't work. But Nyquil does.
ReplyDeleteHuh oh, no post today. I hope that doesn't mean the bird flu got you. Just raise a clammy hand to type a few keys if you're still alive.
ReplyDeleteDrink lots of fluids, get lots of rest. That's what I did (doctors orders).
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you are going through it now.
Hope you feel better soon.
Darn, and I feel like I just got here!
ReplyDelete