In case you didn't hear me shrieking with glee, or in case you DID hear me shrieking and you were worried I may have slammed my hand in a car door, I thought I'd let you know that I was shrieking with glee because Schmutzie got super high, ate and entire package of pizza rolls, and then decided to feature me on Five Star Friday last week!
I know, can't you just die happy now?
So, after Jesus, I suppose I should thank Heinous again for his prompt that started my now-famous post. Well, maybe not famous so much as...infamous. Or, you know, completely forgotten about already. But whatever, I'm just super excited to have been stuck in a list with all those other great bloggers. It's much better than the time I got stuck in a list with all those felons. They liked to goose me.
Anyway, you'll notice I didn't post over the weekend. Yeah, that's my new thing now, you like it?
I spent all weekend jacking around on Landers, although I did get a lot of homework done yesterday. Tonight is the much anticipated return to my Imaginitive Writing class with Mr. MLK Jr. McTardy Pants. I am scared to death, and not sure exactly what I'm scared OF. That the professor's giant dred locks will come to life and strangle me? (Hmmm maybe there's a story in that premise...) That I'll be marked tardy AGAIN this time because my school is in some kind of alternate universe where no matter what time leave work, I will always arrive at 7:15 and have to walk into the workshop late and flustered?
My plan is to head over there straight after work and re-read the assignments and prepare for death, you know, just in case those stinky hair balls really do come after me tonight. If you don't hear from me tomorrow, contact Inspector Vidal Sassoon poste haste!
PS - My creative non-fiction piece is coming along, coming slowly along - I will post it here as soon as I have my rough draft finished. It's just that I'm writing it about - what else? - the baby because there's no other event in my mind that even remotely resembles "life-changing" at the moment, and I'm kind of stuck on a few parts that I must have blocked out of my memory already (or maybe that was the vicoden), so I'm having to rehash a lot of non-happy feelings, and then everyone I know is pregnant or just had a baby or just got engaged (non-related, I realize) so I'm all blinded by gigantic belly buttons and plotting more kidnappings, and it's really cutting into my productive writing time, you know?
It's good to have your writing recognized as being something other than the normal schlock that rides the waves out there.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations.
As for your class...Forget that. You can't teach "Creativity." I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that your teacher is a failed, frustrated writer who takes an unadmitted pleasure in hassling you becasue he wants you to fail just like he did.
If you want to write...just lock yourself in a room and write.
Oh yes...and drink whiskey.
Your future children will thank you for it.
"Hey, Cat, where you been, you TAR-DAY!" (Old joke from a comic whose name I have forgotten)
ReplyDeleteI was beginning to think you were pulling my leg about the CNF piece. I'm waiting! (tap, tap, tap)
Seriously, though, good to hear things are in progress. And when you say 'baby' do you mean your baby? 'Cause if you do, I must have missed something! What's up?
I was honored to be on that Five Star Friday list, too! Very pleased to see I was in some good company (which means you, my dear :)), although I don't know who recommended me. Coolness unbound!
I am taking an English class this semster and my first assignment is to write about a "memerable event" dont these teachers have any other ideas?? : ) I am stuck since I seem to not have anything memerable happen to me. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteWhat's up with dred locks.
ReplyDeleteThey collect dust.
That's just gross.
Good luck getting to class
tonight, on time.
If you're late, tell Mr. Teacher
you were there, he just couldn't
see you past his hair. ha ha ha ha ha!
Congrats on being featured and thanks for the virtual Nyquil and cuddles. I really needed that this morning and you came through for me.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your writing class tonight. XOXO
I dont post on weekends either.
ReplyDeleteYumm pizza rolls
Oh Cat, you describe your tardy alternate universe in such a funny way. I am constantly 2-5 minutes late getting my kids to school, I feel like the bad parent in school, you know the one. LOL
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your class, I think you are pretty safe from the dreadlocks, don't let them distract you from your work, unless they become the focus of your creative writing, he he.
Congrats on being featured! That is fucking awesome.
ReplyDeleteJust so ya know, Schmutzie doesn't submit the posts, blog readers submit to Schmutzie. That sounds dirty, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteNot that I'm suggesting anything, but if you killed Mr. MLK Jr. McTardy Pants you would SO get a book deal out of it. Your instant fame and huge sales would turn you into a celebrity so you'd get a "special" trial. Then you get a reduced sentence in a schwank low security prison where you can start working on your second book and iron out the details on the movie deal.
ReplyDeleteNot that I'm suggesting anything.
You completely deserve that feature! And you deserve the weekends off from this blog. I think you're gonna get yourself an A with the story you're working on. It's really coming along nicely and each part gets better and better. :)
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking I should go back to college, and then I realize I have developed rather a severe lack of tolerance for nazis like Mr McTardy Pants and think I might not do so well if nazi crankiness were directed at me. Depending on my mood and current level of pain/discomfort/nausea or lack thereof, I could burst into tears, yell "fuck you, nazi pants" or just slink off, never to return. None of which shows any shred of adultiness or competence or you know, being even in the same universe as rational grown up human.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! You are just a blogging superstar these days!
ReplyDelete(Tearing up)
I feel so honored to know you in a blogger/facebook sorta way.
Will you sign my boob? I'll never wash it again...
So, if you are tardy again, does that make you re-tardy?
ReplyDeleteSorry. It's bad. I know.
Yay for you on being features! Whoot!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on getting featured, that's a great feeling!
ReplyDeleteI like not posting on the weekends, I do it too.. gives me some time to catch up on life that way.
Your school sounds weird. Who takes attendance in college? Are you sure you're not in high school?
Nice job getting featured! Infamous, famous... same thing, isn't it?
ReplyDeletecongrats! i don't smell bacon? maybe it's your feet?
ReplyDelete:)
Ok, it's Tuesday?
ReplyDeleteDid the dreadlocks get you?