Saturday, July 16, 2011

Totally boned. And not in the *good* way.

Hi.

I have so much drama happening and I can't talk about any of it. SUCKY. This is the first time in Zippy's history that I've been unable to use you freaks as free therapy.

Wait, is there a confidentiality clause on the internet?

Hmm. Didn't think so.

Instead of telling you anything AT ALL about what's going down in Zippy town, I'll have to be content to show you these.

Why has it never occurred to me to glue shit to MY car?

Someone left this hat at my house. I don't know who. I also don't know what I'm doing with my hand.

Someone else left THIS hat at my house. It may have been my dead grandfather.

This is me at the hospital with my broken toe. Did I mention they didn't give me enough pain pills? The worst part about this injury is that I just purchased a bunch of shoes on Ebay. And I can't wear any of them for four to six weeks.  Baaad savings karma, clearly.

I miss this.

My new motto. Except...it's also retroactive.

What happens when you hand me a paintbrush.

Inside joke. Most of you have probably heard it. Guess that makes it an outside joke.

Good god. HOW BIG IS THE 500+ lbs TOILET? I'm afraid to know.


5 comments:

  1. You shoulda called a toe truck! My kids love that one. I mean they hate it. It got pretty old around the 100th time I used it.

    Holy Jabba the Hut...

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  2. I'm sorry about your toe! And I'm sorry about all those lonely new shoes waiting patiently for your return.

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  3. Stop injuring yourself, would you? Jeez.

    How the hell do people keep leaving your hats there?

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  4. Houston has an Art Car culture. People glue stuff to their cars all the time and then they all get together and have parades.

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  5. Who would have thought that something so small could hurt so much? Reminds me of my 4foot 10in girl friend who dumped me last year!

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You.Yeah, you. Speak the fuck up.