Toys, yes. For kids? Not so much.

I've gotten several product review/giveaway offers from companies recently. The most offensive offer I received was from Fisher-Price.

I say offensive because...SERIOUSLY? CHILDREN'S TOYS + THIS BLOG = A VERY ICY, FROZEN HELL.

Dear Cat ,

                       Fisher-Price® is inviting the readers and followers of Zipbag of Bones to enter into The Little People™ Animal Sounds Contest calls on parents to submit a video of their child demonstrating his or her best roar, grrrr or squawk (oh my!) for the chance to win a $10,000 cash prize and a trip to Fisher-Price headquarters in East Aurora, N.Y. for a special photo shoot!

Fisher-Price is thrilled to launch a contest of this magnitude that also gives people the chance to submit their entries via an iPhone® or Android™ mobile device and taps into social media trends by encouraging consumers to share their video links on Facebook and ask

 their friends and families to vote.

Thank you for your kind consideration and I look forward to

working with you on this exciting contest!

Best,

Ariel

Abramowitz Freeman Public Relations

An email to which, of course, I replied:

Deal Ariel,

You've never actually visited my blog, have you?

That is such a nice offer, really it is, but any parents who might read my blog are the kind who would sell their kids' toys for drugs. Or sex. Or possibly DVDs.

As much as I love the little ones making animal noises, I'd be laughed out of the B-o-sphere.
--
Yes, that smell is me,
Cat
***

I didn't get a response.

So that was unfortunate. But you WILL be interested to know I'll be doing another product review for EdenFantasys soon. Sex toys! WOOT! It's been a long time since I've reviewed one of their toys, and I'm thinking it's time to mix it up...maybe something I've never tried before. Maybe something Gray has never tried before. Maybe even something I'm...gulp...afraid of.

OR maybe I'll review one of the free toys they gave me at BlogHer. Only time (and my vagina) will tell.

And, of course, with the product review will be a product giveaway to one very sick, twister reader of mine. So stay tuned for that.